Injured runner: What I’m proud of

It’s easy to get frustrated when things don’t go the way you want them to, the way you think they should go. It’s easy to get annoyed when someone says or acts in a manner that is the complete opposite to what you view as correct or right.

It’s easy for those negative emotions to “turn on.”

I’d always run them off.

In my current state though — slowly returning to running  — I’m doing my very best to not get annoyed or frustrated or mad or sad.

Every run, even if it’s at three-minute intervals, is a victory. If my knee is not in pain, it’s a victory.

I’m currently at stage 5 (of 7) for my Return to Running program from my PT and I’m proud to say that every single run/walk I’ve done, I’ve done outside. I have not done a single one on the dreadmill. This has meant run-walking in complete darkness after work. This has meant run-walking in the cold and rain on the weekends.

I would never run on a treadmill when I was fully healthy so why would I run-walk on one?

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Life as a (temporary) spectator

In all my ~12 years of running half marathons and marathons, I had never spectated a race until last Sunday.

I’ve never spectated because I’ve aways been the runner. Or, there were some times when I “just ran the half” and cheered Bryce or other friends into the finish as they completed the full marathon of the same event.

Joanna was doing the Seattle Marathon and as my partner in marathon training and pain, I wasn’t going to miss cheering her on for the 26.2 miles of post-Thanksgiving festivities.

This was my very first time as a race spectator!

It was so heartwarming to see all the runners out there — well let’s be honest — suffering as the rain rolled in. Some managed to grimace as I cheered them on. (Even with a cowbell it was darn tiring!) Some just looked forward with blank stares as they ran on. Some even cheered for me, the spectator!

I identified with each and every one of these marathoners.

It made me wish I could just jump in and run alongside all of them.

Joanna fought hard and had a really strong finish. Friends like her motivate me to work hard at PT, to work hard at my “return-to-running” program, so that I can be back out there and cross many more finish lines.

I won’t allow myself to be a spectator forever.

Injured runner: An exciting week (but not for running)!

I don’t know why this has turned into the year Kristin became a bad blogger. You’d think that all the extra time I have from not being able to run, I’d be able to at least crank out one post a week. Nope.

But, I have exciting news!

Two-and-a-half weeks ago I got engaged! And then a day later I found out I received a promotion at work! And then a week after that, I was able to successfully purchase tickets to Hamilton (for the Seattle show next year!) And then a day after that, I fainted and fell in public!

So, I guess my attention has been elsewhere …

 

Not to get off topic, but I am fine (from the fainting). I tend to faint once or twice a year so I guess I was due for this year’s episode. I went to the doctor just to make sure everything was OK and all blood work returned normal.

Hopefully, a positive running update will soon follow all this other happy personal and professional news!

Stronger than you think

I looked up from the TV monitor attached to the elliptical, tired of another “Chopped” rerun on the Food Network, and saw a wall full of motivational phrases and words painted across from me.

It was a Saturday morning of PT exercises followed by some form of cardio at the gym.

I was over it. I’ve been over it. I am over it.

Who knew that August of last year when the doctor diagnosed me with a stress fracture of the knee after my first MRI, that I would still not be running today. (For the record, he told me I’d be running anywhere from six weeks to six months).

It’s been 14 months since then.

I’ve had a new doctor since then.

I’ve done a lot of walking, swimming, PT exercises, stationary biking and elliptical-ing. I’ve talked a lot about not running. I’ve written a lot about not running.

But, back to that Saturday morning at the gym.

One phrase on the wall stood out to me the most: You are stronger than you think.

I kept repeating the sentence over and over in my head as I continued using the elliptical. It was kind of cathartic.

In all 10, 15+ years of being a runner*, not running has been the biggest challenge.

But, I am stronger than I think. And so are you.

 

*I ran cross-country in high school as a freshman but didn’t even like running then. I did it for the social aspects of being on a team. By no means did I consider myself a runner back then. But, I stuck with the team throughout high school and running became my lifelong friend. As you can see, I’m not good at letting go of friendships. 

Injured runner: Hiking it out

I have a new goal.

If I’m not going to get any running miles in this year, well, I’m going to get some hiking miles in!

My doctor and physical therapist both have no objections to hiking. Doc said maybe wear a brace just so it will mentally make me feel stronger, if nothing else. So, for the past several weekends, I’ve been going on a hike nearly every week.

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My goal? To hike at least 30 times during my 30th year.

My birthday was in June and I have already gone on 10 hikes. (I didn’t officially start this goal until like September with my first hike of the season being in August). Seeing that I have eight more months until my next birthday, I’m pretty confident that I will be able to surpass my goal of 30.

Maybe this is the “silver lining” of being injured from running.

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I get to hike.

When I’m marathon training, my whole schedule revolves around running. Since there’s always a long run that needs to “get done” on weekends, there is never time — or energy — for a hike to fit into my training plans. My priority has always been running.

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I got some great hikes in during the summer with friends and family. Now that it’s cooler — and snowy — Bryce and I have done a few “winter hikes” already. I’m pretty lucky that even though I’m injured from running, I am still able to climb to the tops of mountains, see water falls and witness the Cascades in all of its glory.

Of course, I still miss running every day.

At least now I can have my weekly hike to look forward to.

Into the fall

And, just like that, it’s practically the end of October.

You’d think being injured and not running would give me a lot more “free time.” But, the reality is, I still feel busy.

It takes at least 30 minutes for me to adequately do all my PT exercises, which I strive to do at least five times a week. If you tack on an hour of cardio — either the stationary bike or elliptical — I find myself being at the gym for more than an hour-and-a-half!

I go to my PT appointments every other week.

My knee continues to feel the same.

It’s fall, which is usually my favorite time of year because it’s like a second new year.

But, I’m going on 17 months of being injured … and starting to get pretty anxious and annoyed with the whole situation.

So, fall, show me what you got.

Injured runner update: No update

I went back to the doctor like two weeks ago. He said basically what I figured he would say.

To keep at it with PT. Don’t run yet because all my “hard work” of resting will be for nothing if I start back up while my body isn’t 100 percent.

I didn’t have any questions for him.

I think I knew he was going to tell me those things — or some form of it.

The big teller of it all is that when he had me lay down on my side, and when he pushed my leg down, I’m still not able to push back. My leg can still easily be pushed down.

Gotta keep strengthening those hips. Gotta keep strengthening those glutes.

Oh, and when I am walking or just sitting, gotta make sure my knees do not fall outwards. (My body naturally does this but it’s bad mechanics for runners, or just humans in general).

Am I frustrated? Yeah.

Am I going to be sad and mope about it? No.

It’s been more than a year of being injured and I’m not quitting now.

That’s the “update” for now, anyway.