We will never really understand each other

“I just feel so bad for you that you’ve never been able to experience that,” he said.

My friend wasn’t trying to be condescending or demeening.

I need eight hours of sleep a night to feel good the next day. Nine and I’ll feel great. Anything less than seven-and-a-half and I’m done for.

But, if I go to sleep late (as in, any time after midnight), it doesn’t matter how many hours of sleep I’ve clocked in that night/morning, I’ll still feel tired the next day just from the fact that I went to bed so late.

And, that’s what Collin was getting at. He felt “bad for me” that I couldn’t party it up to the wee hours and still have an exciting adventure-filled day the following day. Instead, the next day would be shot for me. I’d be in a haze. I’d be tired. I’d want to nap even though I don’t usually like naps.

“But you slept for nine hours!” he would exclaim.

It wouldn’t matter though. And, he just wouldn’t understand how my body could not function the next day even though I received “my sufficient hours of Zs.”

Sometimes, we are never going to fully understand one another. And, I’m not talking empathy. I’m talking about scenarios like this one. Or, scenarios where someone finds it uncomfortable to poop at his/her significant other’s house even though they have been dating for nearly a year. So, they make up excuses like they need to pick up extra gym clothes from their own house, or they need to let the dog out, when really, it’s because they need to go use the restroom. (Yes, this is a real story that a real person has told me. It happens and I will never understand. If you gotta go, you gotta go, right?)

Something that seems so normal for one person can be a completely abnormal concept for another. And, it doesn’t matter the amount of explaining you do — the other person will just not “get it.” Even if they are trying their hardest to understand.

Maybe it’s because of a difference in background or culture. Maybe it’s a difference in lifestyle. Maybe it’s a difference in age or gender. Maybe it’s a difference in point of views and opinions. Maybe it’s something else.

All I know is that I can’t control how my body will feel the next day when I stay up late, which is why I don’t like to stay up late too often.

But, maybe this is just me getting older.

Or, maybe we will just never really understand each other.


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