I’m trying to remember what I felt when I was racing those early miles at the Eugene Marathon — or even any of my long training runs leading up to that race.
Because I felt great during all of those miles.
I felt strong, fit and fast.
The race was a month-and-a-half ago, yet my body feels like it was half-a-year ago.
I feel like I’ve lost my base, my fitness, my speed — all of it!
(That’s what I get for running so sporadically the past month …)
Several weeks ago I began feeling very sluggish and well, “fat.” And, yes, I know you are rolling your eyes but as a runner, when you gain a little weight, it makes a huge difference.
And, it wasn’t all in my head because I have discovered that several of my work pants no longer fit me. My roommate Joanna didn’t believe me so I had to physically show her that one of them will no longer button! (Her response: Well, maybe your hips are finally coming in, Kristin! So, you know, later on you can give birth…)
I scrolled through all of the photos my dad captured of me during Eugene. And, even the ones on the track where I am in oh-so-much-pain, at least I still look (kind of) strong.
I want that strong to come back. I want to feel fit again. (And, I want to be able to fit into all of my pants!)
This means being disciplined and start running regularly again. I haven’t pinpointed what my next race will be so for now I will develop a base so that when training begins, I won’t have to start from square one.
Because, right now I feel like I’m at zero.
But starting at zero means there’s nowhere to go but up.
So, up I go!