Not a hugger

I do not hate hugs. I do not love hugs.

It’s just, I’m not a huge fan of the hug.

Sometimes, my friends say I flinch if they get near me.

And, my roommates make fun of me for being a “bad” hugger anyway. Joanna says I give an awkward half hug. I think Erica and Alex know by now to not even attempt to touch me.

My hugging comfortable-ness and observations:

– If you are going in for a hug, I will hug you. Even if I do not know you that well, I will hug you. I will not dodge the hug. But, I will wait for you to initiate.

– On a day-to-day basis, I will never initiate a hug. (OK, exceptions being boyfriend and grandma, not many others though).

– A few of my close friends now know that I do not like hugs. But, they make a big deal about not hugging me. (I will hug you back! Don’t not hug me because you know I am not a hugger).

– There are “known huggers” in the world. For these former classmates, acquaintances, teammates, friends, former coworkers, I will simultaneously go in for the hug with them. I am OK with this. (Note: I am not initiating the hug. I am just aware that these type of people always hug. They hug when they say hello, when they say bye. They hug even more when inebriated).

– When someone really needs a hug, I will initiate the hug. And, these I do without thinking, it’s instinct.

– For friends and family members I go months and years on end without seeing, I hug. This just happens naturally. I miss them!

– I often go in for the side hug rather than a full hug if I am feeling particularly uneasy about hugging you. (Or, just lazy).

Don’t hate me for not being a hugger. It’s not like I’m a cold person with no heart. I conform when I need to. I don’t know why I react to hugs this way. It’s not even something I noticed until recently. And, it’s not like I was never hugged as a child. I grew up in a loving family with parents who hugged me. There are pictures of me as a child holding and hugging my baby brother.

And yes, I admit, hugs can be nice and make you feel better.

But, they’re just not my thing.

This is a picture of my cousins. After approx. 10 minutes looking through photos, I could not find one of me hugging anyone.

These are my lovely cousins. After approx. 10 minutes looking through photos, I could not find one of me hugging anyone.

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