I do not hate hugs. I do not love hugs.
It’s just, I’m not a huge fan of the hug.
Sometimes, my friends say I flinch if they get near me.
And, my roommates make fun of me for being a “bad” hugger anyway. Joanna says I give an awkward half hug. I think Erica and Alex know by now to not even attempt to touch me.
My hugging comfortable-ness and observations:
– If you are going in for a hug, I will hug you. Even if I do not know you that well, I will hug you. I will not dodge the hug. But, I will wait for you to initiate.
– On a day-to-day basis, I will never initiate a hug. (OK, exceptions being boyfriend and grandma, not many others though).
– A few of my close friends now know that I do not like hugs. But, they make a big deal about not hugging me. (I will hug you back! Don’t not hug me because you know I am not a hugger).
– There are “known huggers” in the world. For these former classmates, acquaintances, teammates, friends, former coworkers, I will simultaneously go in for the hug with them. I am OK with this. (Note: I am not initiating the hug. I am just aware that these type of people always hug. They hug when they say hello, when they say bye. They hug even more when inebriated).
– When someone really needs a hug, I will initiate the hug. And, these I do without thinking, it’s instinct.
– For friends and family members I go months and years on end without seeing, I hug. This just happens naturally. I miss them!
– I often go in for the side hug rather than a full hug if I am feeling particularly uneasy about hugging you. (Or, just lazy).
Don’t hate me for not being a hugger. It’s not like I’m a cold person with no heart. I conform when I need to. I don’t know why I react to hugs this way. It’s not even something I noticed until recently. And, it’s not like I was never hugged as a child. I grew up in a loving family with parents who hugged me. There are pictures of me as a child holding and hugging my baby brother.
And yes, I admit, hugs can be nice and make you feel better.
But, they’re just not my thing.